Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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