stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
