There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Randomize