Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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