He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
