Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
