she sounds like chewbacca in bed
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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