I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
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it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
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I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
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