I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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