just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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