Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
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