I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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