ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
