Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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