The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
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