i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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