Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize