it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
The best revenge is premature balding
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
im holly from the hills drunk
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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