i permit you to call me
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
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Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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