susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
