Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
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