I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize
