got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize