i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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