i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
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His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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