My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
