I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
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