I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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