I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize