Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.