There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
