Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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