so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
So much rum. So many feels.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
