ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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