i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
