the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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