I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
