just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Do vagina's smell?
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
