Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
