Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
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