Fuck appropriateness.
He passed out mid-signature
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
