there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize