if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
she peed on how many people?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
