What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
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I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
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OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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