Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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