he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
