you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
