you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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