She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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