This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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